Assumptions

I was late meeting up with family yesterday.

Sometimes it takes longer to get going with a little one than I plan for.

He was joyfully frolicing on the bed while I ran around repacking his bag... again.  Oh how he loves to unpack bags!

Motherhood has more joys to it than I ever imagined... despite having imagined for approximately 22 years. And watching this little man squeel in delight as he throws clothes and diapers from his bag is one of the many little daily pleasures.

As delightful as it is, it is also time consuming and causes my usual punctual self to occasionally run a little behind when trying to leave the house.

It was during this moment of tardiness that I received a bit of insight... a little wake up call about the many assumptions that I (don't we all?) make.

12 years ago I was a want-to-be-mom visiting with my sister-in-law, a new mom.  We had plans leave her house at, say 10am. I arrive early and my nephew was nursing. Then burping. More nursing. Fell asleep. (It's well after our designated leaving time by now, but who wants to wake a sleeping baby?) Baby wakes, needs changed. Hungry. More nursing. More burping. Spit up - change clothes. Into the car seat and, finally, off we go. 

I remember (grumpily) making the assumption that IF my sister-in-law planned differently we could have left on time.

As I wrangled my little one into the car seat yesterday, I remembered many of the other assumptions I'd made about child rearing during my years of infertility.

How wrong I had been in those assumptions! More accurately, I was wrong to assume I knew all of the many fine details that go into each individuals day to day life and therefore their decisions.

Could my sister-in-law have packed up my nephew as soon as I arrived so that we could have been on our way? Sure. Would she (and I) have missed out on a relaxing time at home enjoying the baby. Absolutely.

OH those assumptions.... placing our views and opinions into situations where we have no knowledge (and no authority) to do so. 

How easy is it to do so! Those flitting thoughts that pass through, almost subconsiously. 

Glancing at the overweight person who is parked as close to the shopping center as possible and thinking "If they'd park a little farther from the door they'd get the exercise they need!".

Spotting a beggar on the street corner and thinking "They'll just buy booze with the money."

And even when it concerns ourselves "I can't talk to that guy/gal, they won't want to have anything to do with me."

I'm challenging myself, and I challenge you - catch yourself in the midst of making assumptions.  Try to be kind by giving people (and yourself) the benefit of the doubt.  If you must make an assumption, assume the good.

At the end of the day, isn't that what everyone wants? To do good, to be thought of as good.












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